I'm having issues with my 3-year old. Nothing I that I don't think most parents go through but she is my first child and in many ways, I am clueless.
I read parenting books. Sometimes. I prefer novels quite frankly. But there are some good ones out there, and some not so good ones. I have liked:
But here's the thing. As much as I like a book, when it comes to the moment, I can't pull out the chapter on making no mean no or on disciplining with rewards or when punishment is appropriate. That was something like 200 pages ago and it's competing with a whole list of other things in my brain like baby shower planning, my mom coming to visit, cleaning the house, working on quilts, planning preschool for Wednesday -- you know, every day gotta do it stuff.
That's why reference-type books are awesome! I love love love the What to Expect books and this particular nursing book:
If I have a problem, I look it up!
But behavioral analysis and advice doesn't exactly work that way it seems.
So my lightbulb! (It's only taken how long for this one to come up?)
Step 1: Isolate your problem (for me, currently, how to make no mean no)
Step 2: Find a solution -- just one, but make it one you like and can do
Step 3: Simplify it so it will fit on one sheet of paper in large letters.
Step 4: Makes lots of copies.
Step 5: Hang them all over the house.
Ok that might only work if your child can't read.
But I'm thinking, this is the way that I can do it! When my 3-year old does something I don't want her to do, I say no. And then when she does it again, out of the corner of my eye I see that sign that says "after the first no, take her to her room" and I'll do it!
Then I just have to remember to follow up with hugs and praise when she listens after the first no.
But I think I can do that.
But behavioral analysis and advice doesn't exactly work that way it seems.
So my lightbulb! (It's only taken how long for this one to come up?)
Step 1: Isolate your problem (for me, currently, how to make no mean no)
Step 2: Find a solution -- just one, but make it one you like and can do
Step 3: Simplify it so it will fit on one sheet of paper in large letters.
Step 4: Makes lots of copies.
Step 5: Hang them all over the house.
Ok that might only work if your child can't read.
But I'm thinking, this is the way that I can do it! When my 3-year old does something I don't want her to do, I say no. And then when she does it again, out of the corner of my eye I see that sign that says "after the first no, take her to her room" and I'll do it!
Then I just have to remember to follow up with hugs and praise when she listens after the first no.
But I think I can do that.
